I just remembered one of my all time favorite stories ever by one of my all time favorite people ever, Ned, my old roommate from Columbus.

Now, Ned reads the blog some and so maybe he can fill me in on details that I’ve missed. But basically it came to pass that Mr. Ned and his girlfriend at the time were going through a rough patch. Well, let’s call it a break up. Yes, all good things come to an end and sometimes, especially with relationships, it’s not an easy thing.

Ned had to go to work, let’s say, at 4pm. Well, they started the breaking up earlier in the day, but these things take time. So when the time for Ned to leave for work rolled around, both parties were in a very unhappy, very sad state. And like many break ups, this one had to be done right. You can’t just leave in the middle of a break up. But what about work? What can be done?

The solution for Ned was to do the right thing. Ned called in sad.

That’s right. Ned picked up the phone, dialed his manager and said, “Hello Brian (Brian is a good manager name, isn’t it?), this is Ned. I can’t come in tonight…. I’m sad.”

Brian, obviously taken aback, replied, “Oh.. I’m .. sorry. Are you going to be ok?” Ned confirmed that he was indeed going to be ok. “So do you think you’ll be able to come in tomorrow?” And Ned assured Brian that he would probably be ok by then, but that today he was just sad and couldn’t work.

And there you have it, folks. It’s a rare situation when you have to call in sad, but when you have to do it, what other choice can you make? You can work when you’re sick. You can work when you were out too late. But you can’t work when you’re sad, and nobody should ever expect you to.

All glories to Ned! Hoorah!

Wow. It’s horrible. I’m doing a multi-city trip. It requires four stations. However, for some reason, one of the stations on their list of stations isn’t available. And would they tell me which one? No. I just had to guess. So I did. And after two tries, I got it right. One of the stations in Seattle is apparently just on the list for pretty, because I can’t get a train into it.

Anyway, I figured it out and ordered my Amtrak tickets. Here is my Amtrak itinerary.

Aug 16
11:35pm – Leave SLC

Aug 17
5:50pm – Arrive in Sacramento
7:40pm – Leave Sacramento
9:12pm – Arrive in Berkeley

Aug 19
9:09pm – Leave Berkeley
10:55pm – Arrive in Sacramento
11:59pm – Leave Sacramento

Aug 20
8:45pm – Arrive in Seattle

Holy cow. That’s a lot of traveling. I should have just taken planes. But I want some alone time too. so there we are.

I still don’t know what I’m doing about maybe or maybe not returning to SLC after Seattle. I’d like to see the countryside. But who knows.

And on another note….
I’m generally a really nice guy. I’m kind and patient and all around swell. But sometimes I just … say things… they just, you know, come out.

Example:

Girl: I always feel smarter than my friends. Like, I was talking about post modernism and they just gave me blank stares and had no idea what it is.
Me: Do they know what bullshit posturing is?

I didn’t mean to say that. But I did mean it.

Take THAT.

1) I’ve started thinking about a new book. My “visual poems” are ready. Except one, maybe. But that’s ok, I’m still going ahead with this, if I have to replace one, so be it.

This book will be a bit different than my usual ones. I’m going with the Japanese binding, I think. I’m not 100% sold on this idea, but I’m pretty sure I am. I have nineteen poems, which is a good size for a chapbook. I’m going to have the cover printed, either screen or litho or some other weird technique that Sarah (GooodStorySarah) just discovered. She’ll be doing the covers (front and back) and I’ll be printing the guts at home on some kind of paper that isn’t white copy paper.

We’re heading down to Harrisburg this Sunday to find paper. I’d personally like a black cover with red or brown ink. But we’ll see. I think I have an image picked out for it. I was secretly hoping that Sarah would read my stuff and be magically inspired, thinking “oh my god! I have the perfect idea for the cover!” But that’s ok.

2) Travel. I bought the Iceburn tickets. And now I’m still trying to figure out if I’m going to go back to Salt Lake City after Seattle or will just fly out of Seattle. What if I choose to come back to SLC and, upon my first visit, hate it a whole hell of a lot and have a huge blast of fun in Seattle? Or… what if I choose to fly back via Seattle and, upon my first visit to SLC fall in love with it and want to come back?

I don’t think I’ll be able to make this decision when I get there. I think I’ll need to have the ticket bought by then. But who knows. I should just fly out of Seattle for logistics reasons. Hm. Must think on this more.

I’ll definitely be buying the Amtrak tickets today. That’s a definite.

3) The band Wire is amazing.

D) Jeff comes back today. That sort of came out of nowhere, but it’s perfect because he can help me with the book. I think he can print the guts of it while I’m at work. He leaves at the end of the month.

5) There is a weird and subtle, but obnoxious smell in or around my apartment. It depends, I think, upon which way the wind is blowing. It’s one of those smells that most people couldn’t smell. (My super power is my sense of smell – awesome me.) I think it’s my roof. I’m hoping that it will go away. The smell, not the roof. It’s one of those smells that will stick with me for awhile. I lit incense and it doesn’t help. It’s also one of those smells that I will think that I smell, but really don’t. It’s just that much in my memory. I’m weird. Love me as I am or not at all.

6) I posted the ’75 Bajaj on Craiglist this morning and am already entertaining a scammer. He’s trying to get me to give him my back account numbers so that he can issue me a certified check so he can buy this bike for his nephew. Of course, I want cash in hand and local pick up only. But he’s assuring me that he can fix the bike if there’s anything wrong with it. So at this point, I’m going to tell him about the flange. Yes, the flange. It’s a bit loose, but a flange is pretty easy to tighten if you have a flange winger.

I hate it when my flange needs winging.